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VIDEO: 10 most irritating things about Kenyans from Diaspora

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One time, a friend of mine went on a two-week tour of the USA and when she came back to Kenya, he couldn’t stop saying, “You know worr I am sayin?”

After visiting a foreign country, it’s normal to find locals adopting a tweng. Never mind, Kenyans who studied in India, Italy, Russia, Ukraine and Greece rarely return with accents that would make you mistake them for a Patel, Marco, Ivanov, Alexei or Costopoulos.

Here are 10 irritating things when Diaspora Kenyans jet home:

1. Ngai!..Am I safe?
This mohine who has lived in Dandora all his life, before getting a scholarship to study in some community church run college in Wyoming, will ask his childhood friends: “Is Buruburu safe after six?” when they ask him to join them for drinks.

2. Do you take cards?
Otieno, who grew up in Kasipul-Kabondo before he was saved by some missionaries who took him to Canada for college studies, will ask if he can swipe his Visa card at the local butchery.

3. Is that sparkling or orange water?
Seriously? How do you expect a shopkeeper in a sleepy village in Murang’a to stock sparkling water? People there drink water straight from Mathioya River and have never died of bilharzia…

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4. Like back in the US… my foot
Every sentence has to have a comparison of how different things are like back ‘home’ in the US of A… “This traffic… my God!… like back in the US there is nothing like this!” …”Like back in the US…things are efficient, there is service delivery… “

New York. PHOTO/FILE

5. Gas is petrol, right?
These Diaspora guys come and shortly forgot they called ‘ngata’ petrol. They call it gas and thus have to go to a gas station…  supermarkets are convenience stores. And they will ask whether you moved houses to a ‘Condo’… and when you zubaa whether they meant ‘kondoo’ they correct  that it’s ‘condominium’ back in Delaware…which is a Shagz like mid Atlantic State equivalent to Ruiru in Kenya. And by the way, nobody gives a rat’s butt what you call things in the US!

6. I can’t speak Luhya fluently
These are nincompoops who used to get the ‘disk’ for not speaking proper English or Swahili and always translated English from vernacular when talking during the Kibaki presidency. But now they proudly brag through their noses that “I only speak Luhya and Swa kidogo!”

7. Is mutura inspected?
Yes, we know Kamande the butcher handles money, and still uses the same hands to roast mutura. But we have been eating his food since we got our first jobs and nothing has ever happened…apart from an occasional stomach ache that Vodka quickly cured. But when these Diaspora charlatans come everything has cholera!

Kenyan traditional sausage (Mutura). PHOTO/FILE

8. Don’t you guys tip…
Tipping waitresses and bar maids is good. But many Kenyans who just landed from London take it a step too far. Hey will tip a waitress Sh1000 after paying a Sh1, 500 bill. They even tip gas station attendants!

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9. Overnight patriots
They look for Maasai market where they buy and wear Masaai shukas and sandals everywhere. They want African things. They want to tour the Maasai Mara, yet when they lived in Pangani estate they furthest they ever went was for a “loose mbuzi thing” (read goat eating) at Ole Polos in Kajiado.

10. Polite dictators
If they have been given stuff to deliver to you, they will make sure you pick them from where they are… like when they jet at midnight, you should be there because “I don’t want luggage!” and when they go to Mombasa, they carry your stuff and you have to wait for them.

-SDE

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Africa

US warns Kenyans over fake marriages, says they won’t be allowed to fly out

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The US embassy in Nairobi on Monday issued a warning to Kenyans getting duped into fake marriages to acquire a visa.

Through their official social media pages, the embassy advised caution in the event somebody offers to get you a green card using dubious means.

“Has anyone ever told you they can get a green card for you? Don’t believe them! They are lying and just trying to steal your money. Don’t believe them when they say you can have a fake marriage and still get your green card.

“If you apply with a fake marriage, you will get caught and you will not get your green card. You will become permanently ineligible to ever go to the United States, and you will never be able to get a U.S. visa or a green card,” the embassy warned.

Visa denied FILE/PHOTO

Kenyans were further urged to apply for a visa or the green card lottery by themselves.

The statement conveyed: “You don’t need to use a fixer to apply for the diversity visa or green card lottery. You can do it yourself and pay the required fee.”

The embassy stated that one should only apply through the Embassy’s official website.

“If you know about anyone promising they can get a green card for you if you enter into a fake marriage, go to the police and report them. You should also report them to the U.S. Embassy,” the statement concluded.

READ ALSO:   VIDEO: NTT, A Japanese company with operations in US features in Kenya election petition

Earlier last week, US Ambassador to Kenya Robert Godec announced that the United States government was gearing up to fight fake news in Kenya adding that it had eroded confidence in Kenya’s real news media.

Speaking during an interview, Godec stated: “Fake news is being weaponized. It’s undermining democracy in Kenya.”

President Uhuru Kenyatta with US Secretary of Transport Anthony Foxx (C) and Ambassador Robert Godec when he led a US business delegation to State House, Nairobi on June 25, 2015. PHOTO | PSCU

He further remarked: “We’re not asking them to believe any particular thing. We’re just urging people not to take everything they see on their phone via WhatsApp as the truth because it may not be.”

Source -Kenyans.co.ke

 

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VIDEO: Former Kenya’s head of Civil Service Francis Kimemia speaks to VOA

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BY BMJ MURIITHI

Former Kenya’s head of Civil Service and Secretary to the Cabinet who is the current governor of Nyandarua County, Francis Kimemia, has told the Voice of America (VOA) that contrary to a position taken by some naysayers, the devolved system of government is fast transforming Kenya in a myriad ways.

During an interview at VOA’s headquarters in Washington DC Thursday, Kimemia hailed the “good relations between Kenya and the US,” as well as the assistance extended by the latter over the years to the East African nation in support of good governance.

“I am very proud of the role I played in ensuring that the constitution was changed to pave way for the county system of governance,” he said. Kimemia also spoke on several topical issues, including Corruption, national reconciliation and eviction of Kenyans from Mau Forest, Kibera and other areas.

Earlier in the day, he was a guest at an online live-streaming event organised by Voice of America’s Student Union, an online community and news site for international students who study or wish to study in the United States.

Kimemia was among Kenyan Governors, their deputies and Senators who attended this year’s annual United States National Governors Association (NGA) Summer session in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

READ ALSO:   VIDEO: Chiloba finally speaks out on Msando's death

Watch the Full interview here:

23  Kenyan governors, several senators and other government officials joined the general secretary of German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s ruling party, the Chinese and Japanese ambassadors to the United States, and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe’s national security adviser, who also attended the event.

International leaders talked about the relationship between sub-national governments and the federal government. Speakers included the governor of Kenya’s Turkana County, Josphat Nanok – who is also the Chairman og Council of Governors in Kenya, as well  the general secretary of Germany’s Christian Democratic Party.

NGA is an organization consisting of the Governors of the states, territories and commonwealths of the United States which acts as a collective voice for Governors on matters of national policy, as well as allowing governors to share best practices and coordinate inter-state initiatives.

 

Former head of Kenyan Civil Service and Secretary to the Cabinet, who is the current Governor, Nyandarua County, Francis Kimemia during the interview at VOA Studios in Washington DC. PHOTO/VOA

This year’s attendees held discussions on international development and diplomacy.

Later, the Council of Governors Peace Committee held  a meeting with the National Democratic Institute in Washington DC, where they discussed possible areas of partnerships and support for peace and reconciliation efforts.

READ ALSO:   Kenyan man in US charged with attempted murder, attacking his Kenyan landlord with an axe

The Kenyan delegation also visited several US Cities, including Dallas, Texas, where a number of governors attended a Diaspora Conference organized by Kenya Diaspora Advisory Council.

 Voice of America is the U.S.’s largest international broadcaster, reaching 236.8 million people weekly in more than 40 languages. For more information, you can visit our website.

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Africa

Kenyan scientist George Njoroge receives another prestigious award in US

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A US-based Kenyan research scientist has been honoured at a banquet in New York for his discoveries of drugs used to treat cancer and other life-threatening diseases.

Dr George Njoroge was presented with a “pioneer award” from Face2Face Africa, a pan-Africa media company, for his sustained impact on science and medicine.

The 64-year-old Kiambu native holds more than 100 patents for his work on cancer and immunology.

Currently a senior research fellow at the global pharmaceutical company Eli Lilly, Mr Njoroge plans to move next year to Naivasha, where he is establishing a biotechnology institute.

He said he hopes to attract 100 doctoral degree-holders from around the world to take part in the institute’s work on malaria, Aids, diabetes and cancer.

“Africa has to step up the plate and get involved by participating in the global scientific platform,” Mr Njoroge said in accepting the Face2Face Africa award on Saturday.

“We cannot afford to be left behind. In Africa, we have great brains and abundance of resources — we just need to embrace the power of biotechnology.”

He added in an interview that the latest of his numerous awards is particularly meaningful because it specifically honours persons of African origin.

Dr Njoroge credits his now-deceased mother, Alice Nyaucha, for having inspired his interest in science through her work as a practitioner of herbal medicine.

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Dr Njoroge received his undergraduate degree from the University of Nairobi and earned a PhD in organic chemistry at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, Ohio.

He is married to Esther Nyambura, who works at Eli Lilly as an accountant. The couple have two adult children, both of whom are studying for medical degrees.

-Nation.co.ke

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