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City mum narrates her battle with depression after birth of triplets

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Rebecca Musyoki was 26 years old and a HR intern when she found out that she was pregnant.

She was terrified of letting her parents down. Then the worst happened – the man she was dating went quiet on her. At one point, she even got suicidal.

The first time Rebecca heard two heartbeats on her first prenatal scan, she broke down in tears. They were a confirmation that she was carrying not one but two children.

While this would ordinarily have been great news, she was 26 and a human resources intern. She was still living with her parents. How was she going to raise two children?

Up until this point, Rebecca’s life had gone according to plan. She had done well in high school, taken a diploma in law and then another in human resource.

She was also in a relationship with a man she had met at church. None of this, however, prepared her for the task at hand.

“I remember the day my life changed. It had been a normal day at work until I bought food and lunch. From the taste, I thought the food was stale and made a lot of noise.

It was my friend who suggested that I take the pregnancy test which altered the course of my life,” she recalls.

Finding out that she was pregnant was terrifying. She was terrified of letting her parents down. But you can only hide a pregnancy for so long. When she was three months pregnant, she decided it was time.

“I decided to do it at breakfast. I just came on out and told my mother I was pregnant,” she recalls.

Her mother was disappointed. Then came the questions, who was the father? How was he handling it? What was his plan?

Rebecca told her the truth. Her mother knew the man that she was in a relationship with. “My mother then hugged me, she told me that she loved me and reassured me that we would go through this together.”

At this point, the man she was dating seemed like he was up for the idea. Even after Rebecca found out that she was carrying twins and called him crying. He calmed her down. And told her that this was a blessing in disguise.

Then somewhere along the way, around her fourth month of pregnancy, he appeared to have a change of heart.

“He just went quiet on me one day. When I called him to find out why, he told me that he needed us to do a DNA test. His saying this hurt as if someone had pierced through my heart with a sword. Still, I was ready to do the test.”

Determined not to be a part of Rebecca’s life, her now ex-boyfriend told anybody that would listen that the children she was carrying were not his.

“He even wrote a letter to my parents telling them the same thing. It was painful. Very painful,” she narrates, holding back tears.

And she was in this state, hurt, rejected, stressed and anxious when she found out at her 20-week anomaly scan that the children in her belly were not two but three.

The sonographer tried showing her the three sets of spinal cords, but she wouldn’t look. It was too much. This time, she called her mother who reassured her that all would be well.

She soldiered on. Her triplets – Joshua, Joab and Joel – were born on January 23, 2012 through caesarean section after her month-long stay at the hospital.

A day after she was discharged with her children, she was readmitted with a hole in her intestine which occurred during the caesarean section.

“For weeks, my life was a blur. If I was not breastfeeding, I was changing diapers or bathing them. I hardly had time to rest,” she recalls.

Most of the time she was stressed. At one point, she admits, she hated being a mother. It was tough. The hardest part was when one of the boys, Joab, was diagnosed with hypospadias, a congenital condition which needed six surgeries to fix.

He had the first one when he was just three months old. “This was my lowest moment. We would cry together,” she recalls.

No one around her knew that she was struggling with post-partum depression. To make the situation worse, she and her ex-boyfriend finally had the children DNA tested when they were a year old.

They were proven to be his. He still didn’t take responsibility. It was tough being everything for her children.

“I would get very agitated especially when the children cried. No one understood why. I was expected to be happy, grateful. At one point, I even got suicidal. I just wanted to get away from all of it.”

Things began looking up when she finally got a job at a local university when the triplets were two and a half years old. Once she began fending for herself, the depression slowly wore off.

Even with a stable job, being a solo mum of three children all the same age hasn’t been easy. Even when it gets tough, she does what she has to do.

“I want my children to have a good life, and I want to be the best mum I can be to them. This is why I went back to school to get my degree,” she says.

Eventually, she was able to find The multiples to multiples society, a local support group for parents of multiple births, where she has been able to interact and get psychosocial support from other parents of multiples.

“From here, things can only get better,” she smiles.

source:nation.co.ke

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Patricia Kihoro vows not to work with Nick Mutuma following sexual assault allegations

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BY KEVIN KOECH

Musician Patricia Kihoro has said that she will no longer work with Nick Mutuma after sexual assault claims against him resurfaced.

Taking to Twitter, Patricia said she supports calls to boycott the actor and music producer Jaaz Odongo, who was also accused of sexual assault.

“I had started to say something with this tweet but it was difficult to complete for reasons that I’ve been struggling to face, but for now I would like to clearly state that I stand behind the calls to #BoycottNickMutuma and to #BoycottJaazOdongo.

“I will not work with him (Nick), or any other abuser, and will not amplify projects that he or any other abuser is involved in, whether or not I am a part of it. We shot Disconnect before the accusations became public, but what we do now matters,” tweeted Patricia.

According to the singer-cum- actress, she got the conviction to take the stand after having a conversation with Nick, who was initially accused of sexual assault in 2017.

The allegations against him resurfaced after his movie,Sincerely Daisy premiered on Netflix and one Wanjiku Clara tweeted to the streaming service,

“So @netflix do y’all know an actor from Sincerely Daisy has been accused by multiple women of sexual assault?”

Patricia said that she knew both Nick and his accuser but had distanced herself from the situation, a move she termed ‘cowardly’.

She further apologised to sexual assault victims for her silence on the matter as it indicated complicity.

“I spoke to Nick on Friday last week at length. I should have done so much earlier but because I know both Koome and Nick, to varying degrees personally, I chose to slowly distance myself from the situation.

“This was cowardly and wrong on my part….I gave no consideration to the people actually harmed. I was wrong and I am so sorry to the survivors. I believe you and I’m sorry. And to everyone else in this community, I failed to do my part,” she wrote.

On September 19, Nick was prompted to respond to the allegations in a statement that read in part,

“They have been trying to discredit all my hard work and they have done their best to see that my dreams never come true. I would like to categorically state that I am against any form of abuse against women and I always have been.”

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Kabi Wa Jesus returns car gift because it is too low for Kenyan roads 

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BY KEVIN KOECH

Kenyan YouTuber Kabi Wa Jesus has returned his newly acquired Audi A5 car gifted to him by his wife Milly WaJesus on his birthday.

Speaking on their YouTube channel, the social media sensation explained that as much as the car was everything he dreamed of, it became hectic navigating the Kenyan roads because it was too low.

“First of all I want to say a big thank you for the overwhelming support you guys showed us when my love surprised me with this German machine over here and you know I’m super grateful but aki please guys don’t come for me, I’m just saying but this is not to refuse the gift.

“This is it, I wanted this car because it is low, classy-looking and clean and that’s why my love got it. However, my love wanted a Q5 which is like a million bob more. It’s a bigger car, still an Audi but it’s a million bob more and it’s higher.

“So she went ahead and got it for me but after driving it for like four days I felt it’s low to be honest. It doesn’t feel as easy to drive especially on our road. Where we stay is very interior. Now this is what I’m thinking, I’m thinking we add that million bob and upgrade to a bigger car, the Audi Q5,” he said.

According to Milly WaJesus, her decision to ‘purchase’ the Audi Q5 was because of the roads but since her husband wanted a low car she sacrificed her preference and got him what he wanted.

“So my problem has been this for a long time, Kabi wanted a Mercedes-Benz E-Class then we settled on an Audi, but he wanted a car that was low.

“I kept telling him it’s not about where we live because we can always move if we wanted to but it’s about the roads we have in our country and it is unfortunate that you can’t peacefully have the car you want to have especially if you move a lot,” said Milly.

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‘I told him if you want to commit suicide with drinking, take a rope…’ Othuol Othuol’s father speaks

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The father of late comedian Othuol Othuol has moved Kenyans after speaking for the first time following his death.

Othuol’s story was featured on Churchill Show journey series, where his family, close friends and colleagues paid glowing tributes to him.

‘The last time he came home it was January this year. He called me and told me he wanted to come and built his house because everyone was asking him about it,’ his father said.

Adding,

‘He came home and put up a house which is bigger than mine and promised to build me one once he was done’.

Othuol Othuol was known for his love for alcohol and his father and close friend actress Sandra Dacha confirmed this.

‘We had a lot of problems with his drinking style. An I’d urge young people to tread carefully. People have drunk until they are even 100 or 90 years and are still strong because were cautious but not careless. If you do is carelessly then you become careless with your life,’ he,’ explained.

The bereaved father continued,

‘His drinking was a concern to the family. Whenever he would come home, the whole home would be full…chang’aa (local brew) and other drinks. He arrives in the village in the morning but I’d see him in the night when he is going to sleep. Just from one chang’aa den to another and I could go round making noise nyinyi mnaharibu watoto wa watu but he was a grown-up so hakuna mtu anamuharibu.’

The sad father was fed up with his son’s drinking and tried to warn him but his warnings fell on deaf ears.

‘I called him one day and told him if you want to commit suicide with drinking please tell me and the style you want to take. If you want to commit suicide with drinking carelessly, don’t take time, better take a rope and do it. I’ll come to carry you home,” he recalled.

Adding,

‘I thought he could go slow… during the time he was diagnosed with TB, I sent a brother to go and take care of him but he said “no this is my hoúse. If you talk about my drinking and the money is mine, then hatutaelewana”.’

The comedian was raised by his father and stepmother.

By Mpasho.co.ke

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