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When online Mafisi crush on your spouse

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Frankie and Maureen

“I love your lips. “You look so yummy!” “So sexy. Would you be mine?”… If you thought these cheesy love lines are from a lover, you are wrong. In fact, the people involved are strangers and the person being addressed is taken. The platform? Social media. So, what do you do when people openly declare their love for your partner in front of your eyes?

Francis Kiarie aka Frankie of Just Gym It, who runs a YouTube channel Alpha Beta, with his wife Maureen Waititu, says online crushes are not a strange thing. Flowever, overtime he has learnt to ignore them. Flowever, some are difficult to deal with, so he blocks them. The most annoying are gay men who outrightly hit on him. “It is so annoying. I wonder why people cannot respect that I’m married, respect my space and just leave me alone,” he says.

Frankie and Maureen

Frankie and Maureen

Many followers

FI is wife, Maureen, says the hardest bit of living a life online is having to deal with disrespectful people without boundaries. “I once had to deal with a woman, who was crushing on Frankie. The stalker went to an extent of creating a pseudo account and kept on messaging me on how Frank will leave me, claiming they had a relationship,” she recalls.

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The couple are open to one another and share their experiences. “Our line of communication is always open. When crushes become too much, we block them,” she adds.

Having many followers means getting our online posts viewed. No wonder, many couples in the limelight such as musicians, journalists, leaders, among others, are bound to face such issues. And while back in the days, it was almost impossible to be in touch with your crush, social media has brought them closer. The anonymity of it makes it even worse, because some admirers use pseudo accounts to post and comment their hearts out.

Radio personality Anita Nderu, also knows this too well. “Sometimes I go through my comment section and just laugh. But I’m happy they don’t get into my love or me. He trusts me. So when he sees those suggestive comments on my posts, he just ignores them,” she says. However, when it gets worse, Anita doesn’t hesitate to press the block button.

Peter Kabi alias Kabi Wa Jesus, founder of Bantu Films, a videography and photography company, says he and his wife Milly wa Jesus do not entertain suggestive comments on their social media platforms. “We only appreciate those great comments we get from fan love,” says Kabi.

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However, he says whenever he sees suggestive comments on his wife’s post, he ignores them. “It is okay to get comments, especially if you are in the limelight. But of course, we know some comments are not meant for good,” he says.

Peter Kabi and his wife Milly wa Jesus have learnt not to entertain suggestive comments on their posts.

Peter Kabi and his wife Milly wa Jesus have learnt not to entertain suggestive comments on their posts.

But not all are understanding of the situation. Despite being open with her husband, Jasmine Wambui says every suggestive comment or compliment she gets irks her husband. “On many occasions, we talk about understanding each other and how it would be great if trust was built between us. But he still raises questions,” she says. One day it got worse and she had to delete some comments. “I delete suggestive comments to date. I do not want to have issues with my husband,” she says.

Uninvited spectators

Ken Ouko, a sociologist at University of Nairobi, says social media has created a new dilemma in human relations known as ‘existential in congruence’. “Social media has today invited a new complication in domestic or romantic relationships. It has replaced relational exclusivity with uninvited spectatorship. Instagram, for example, makes it appear as if relationships are on a thespian stage complete with a clap-or-boo audience,” he says.

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Also, in many instances, Ouko says saturated positive reviews may cause the other partner to feel relegated, ignored or shadowed, sometimes leading to jealousy. Intense negative reviews may carry the impact of causing the other partner to feel slighted, disrespected, offended or exposed, sometimes leading to doubts.

Ken Munyao, a psychologist at People Centric Management Company, says that is why it is good to try and moderate crushes through the posts you share. “It is not bad to have crushes because it means someone is admiring you. But how far does it go? How much do you entertain the person and do you let them know that there are boundaries?” he poses.

When you get crushes, it is good to reach out and tell them to stop, That is if they get in the way of your relationship. It is also good to declare your relationship online. “You need to come out and say you are taken. This way, maybe some would stop going too far. You will be able to stop jealousy through acknowledging,” he says.

source:People Daily

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Polygamous MP proudly parades his two ‘First Ladies’ during political rally

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Nakuru East Member of Parliament, David Gikaria, recently excited a public gathering when he paraded and introduced his two wives to a gathering.

The incident happened during political rally under the ‘Inua Mama’ campaign in the MP’s home turf.

When invited by Nakuru Senator Susan Kihika to ‘greet’ the crowd, Gikaria seized the opportunity to introduce his wives.

“I’m the Nakuru East MP and when one has a wife or wives, he has to acknowledge them. I have several Nakuru Town East First Ladies. Let me introduce them to you,” Gikaria said while beckoning his wives to the podium.

Both wives stepped forward with smiles on their face as they waved to the cheering crowd.

POLYGAMY

“This is Veronica Wairimu, she is the First Lady number one. And this one is Dorcas Wangui, she is also the First Lady number one B. First Lady number one C is not here, but I will bring her here another day,” the MP said while alternately embracing each of his two wives.

Gikaria’s declaration is well within Kenya’s law which allows a man to marry more than one woman.

In 2013, President Uhuru Kenyatta signed into law the Marriage Bill which legalised polygamy.

It brings civil law, where a man was only allowed one wife, into line with customary law, where some cultures allow multiple partners.

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By Nairobi News

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VIDEO: Bahati breaks down on live TV while narrating his difficult childhood

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Kenyan gospel singer Bahati broke down while being interviewed on NTV’s The Trend show on Friday night, as he opened up about the pain of losing his mother at the young age of seven years.

The singer was overcome by emotions when the show host singer Antoneosoul asked him what he thinks his mother would say about him now.

The emotional Nyota hit maker started by saying how much he misses his late mother.

“At times I miss her… even when I’m growing, as a musician… at times I’m misunderstood… but I’m only trying my best… to make her proud,” a teary Bahati said.

“There are some stories that have been said that I cannot just share with the public. But to my mum everyday I work hard to make her proud,” he added.

Bahati also recounted what he went through as a boy when he witnessed his mother’s death.

“If I can remember so well I was seven at Huruma that is in Mathare constituency. My mum fell sick and I remember it was on 26 December coz watu walikuwa wanakula chapo. And the next day after Christmas niliona akitolewa na blanketi,” he narrated.

By Nairobi News

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Rachel Ruto meets Akothee, showers her with praise

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If you thought you have seen enough of popular musician Esther Akoth, famously known as Akothee, you are in for a big shock as the siren has captured the attention of Second Lady, Rachel Ruto, with her big heart and philanthropic activities in Turkana.

The mother of five held talks with the wife of Deputy President’s William Ruto on Friday who was left awestruck by her initiatives to give back to the less fortunate.

Mrs Ruto took to her social media pages to express her joy at having met the flamboyant businesswoman.

“It was really nice spending time with Esther Akoth ( Akothee) today! What a beautiful story of determination and drive. We thank God for the work Akothee foundation is doing especially in Turkana! Esther has great tenacity & a beautiful spirit! We wish you all the best!” wrote Rachel on Twitter.

The controversial singer also turned to her social media to thank Mrs Ruto for the invite and opportunity to present her projects while at the same time warning her detractors that they had not yet seen the best of her.

“Thank you for the invite Mama. When I finished presenting my Turkana Project to Mama Rachel of building cultural center, schools, dormitory for old people, water project, irrigation, hospitals then she added ‘and a church in each and every center. This touched my heart deep mom! Yes a church mum we all need God,” gushed Akothee.

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“For the rest who see every negative thing on every good course you will soon take back your insults. You will insult me, you will create enmity between me and innocent people. You will try to break me and sabotage everything that I do. But you know what, you can’t stop a determined anointed woman.”

She urged her critics to join hands with her in helping the needy in the society instead of bashing her.

“Charity is a call, it’s not something you learn In school and I can’t do it alone. We are all responsible to our neighbors. Do it in your own small way and get Gods rewards,” she said.

Madam Boss, as she calls herself, has a number of initiatives under her Akothee Foundation, which has seen her recently make several trips to the arid Turkana on humanitarian trips,”

-Nairobinews.com

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