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When online Mafisi crush on your spouse

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Frankie and Maureen

“I love your lips. “You look so yummy!” “So sexy. Would you be mine?”… If you thought these cheesy love lines are from a lover, you are wrong. In fact, the people involved are strangers and the person being addressed is taken. The platform? Social media. So, what do you do when people openly declare their love for your partner in front of your eyes?

Francis Kiarie aka Frankie of Just Gym It, who runs a YouTube channel Alpha Beta, with his wife Maureen Waititu, says online crushes are not a strange thing. Flowever, overtime he has learnt to ignore them. Flowever, some are difficult to deal with, so he blocks them. The most annoying are gay men who outrightly hit on him. “It is so annoying. I wonder why people cannot respect that I’m married, respect my space and just leave me alone,” he says.

Frankie and Maureen

Frankie and Maureen

Many followers

FI is wife, Maureen, says the hardest bit of living a life online is having to deal with disrespectful people without boundaries. “I once had to deal with a woman, who was crushing on Frankie. The stalker went to an extent of creating a pseudo account and kept on messaging me on how Frank will leave me, claiming they had a relationship,” she recalls.

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The couple are open to one another and share their experiences. “Our line of communication is always open. When crushes become too much, we block them,” she adds.

Having many followers means getting our online posts viewed. No wonder, many couples in the limelight such as musicians, journalists, leaders, among others, are bound to face such issues. And while back in the days, it was almost impossible to be in touch with your crush, social media has brought them closer. The anonymity of it makes it even worse, because some admirers use pseudo accounts to post and comment their hearts out.

Radio personality Anita Nderu, also knows this too well. “Sometimes I go through my comment section and just laugh. But I’m happy they don’t get into my love or me. He trusts me. So when he sees those suggestive comments on my posts, he just ignores them,” she says. However, when it gets worse, Anita doesn’t hesitate to press the block button.

Peter Kabi alias Kabi Wa Jesus, founder of Bantu Films, a videography and photography company, says he and his wife Milly wa Jesus do not entertain suggestive comments on their social media platforms. “We only appreciate those great comments we get from fan love,” says Kabi.

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However, he says whenever he sees suggestive comments on his wife’s post, he ignores them. “It is okay to get comments, especially if you are in the limelight. But of course, we know some comments are not meant for good,” he says.

Peter Kabi and his wife Milly wa Jesus have learnt not to entertain suggestive comments on their posts.

Peter Kabi and his wife Milly wa Jesus have learnt not to entertain suggestive comments on their posts.

But not all are understanding of the situation. Despite being open with her husband, Jasmine Wambui says every suggestive comment or compliment she gets irks her husband. “On many occasions, we talk about understanding each other and how it would be great if trust was built between us. But he still raises questions,” she says. One day it got worse and she had to delete some comments. “I delete suggestive comments to date. I do not want to have issues with my husband,” she says.

Uninvited spectators

Ken Ouko, a sociologist at University of Nairobi, says social media has created a new dilemma in human relations known as ‘existential in congruence’. “Social media has today invited a new complication in domestic or romantic relationships. It has replaced relational exclusivity with uninvited spectatorship. Instagram, for example, makes it appear as if relationships are on a thespian stage complete with a clap-or-boo audience,” he says.

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Also, in many instances, Ouko says saturated positive reviews may cause the other partner to feel relegated, ignored or shadowed, sometimes leading to jealousy. Intense negative reviews may carry the impact of causing the other partner to feel slighted, disrespected, offended or exposed, sometimes leading to doubts.

Ken Munyao, a psychologist at People Centric Management Company, says that is why it is good to try and moderate crushes through the posts you share. “It is not bad to have crushes because it means someone is admiring you. But how far does it go? How much do you entertain the person and do you let them know that there are boundaries?” he poses.

When you get crushes, it is good to reach out and tell them to stop, That is if they get in the way of your relationship. It is also good to declare your relationship online. “You need to come out and say you are taken. This way, maybe some would stop going too far. You will be able to stop jealousy through acknowledging,” he says.

source:People Daily

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Death of festivals dims Lamu hope to revive ailing tourism

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Maulid. Food and Expo. Art, yoga and kite festivals. These are just a few of a slew of art and culture experiences that Lamu County used to dish out to the world and which boosted its tourism profile.

Lamu Old Town, also known as “the island of festivals”, had a splendid array of events and festivals ranging from Eid-Ul-Adhar to the Lamu Fishing Competition, Lamu Art Festival, The Lamu Cultural Festival, Lamu Yoga Festival, the Kite Festival, Shella Hat Contest and the Lamu Painters Festival.

But these events were put on the back burner as the tourism sector took a nosedive.

Coming on the backdrop of the Mpeketoni terror attacks in 2014 that also hit tourism hard, hospitality industry players say the vital sector is in the doldrums and want the festivals reinstated. Speaking during a forum in Lamu at the weekend, hoteliers and other players questioned why the county government has not been keen in reviving the events.

Hotelier Salim Abubakar said the county’s tourism sector was on the decline after the festivals were lifted. He urged Governor Fahim Twaha to restore the events and revive the sector.

“All the festivals that were introduced in the calendar of events are crucial. They served to attract visitors, both domestic and international, to Lamu. We need them back so that the tourism sector can be improved,” he said.

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Marketing strategy

Former Lamu Tourism Association (LTA) deputy chairman Ghalib Alwy said the body, in partnership with the county tourism office started the festivals to attract more tourists. Mr Alwy said it is important that the events are retained.

“We launched those events as a marketing strategy for Lamu tourism. Through them, we were able to attract tourists from Kenya, East Africa and the world. This is after the terrorism attacks led to an almost 90 percent decline of the sector. It’s only through the festivals that tourists got the confidence to visit Lamu again. The events must be reinstated,” said Mr Alwy. Mr Mohamed Hassan noted that local tourism was still doing badly, attributing the situation to a section of foreign countries that are still having active travel advisories against their citizens visiting Lamu.

“The travel advisories still play a big role in scaring away tourists. We want as many festivals as possible as they have the ability to ensure the tourism climbs back on its feet,” said Mr Hassan.

Some of the festivals known and which are still being celebrated by many in Lamu includes the annual Lamu Cultural Festival that is marked between November and December, the Maulid Festival marked every January, New Year’s Dhow Race marked on January 1 and Eid Ul-Fitr marked every July.

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The festivals are said to attract more than 30,000 visitors from around the world.

by Nation.africa

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‘I was jobless and about to be kicked out’ Tedd Josiah on how Kenyans came through for him after losing his wife

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Kenyan Music producer and JokaJok founder Tedd Josiah has thanked Kenyans for coming through when he lost his wife Reginah Katar.

Katar passed away just months after welcoming her daughter Jay.

Since then, Tedd says strangers became family and he is forever grateful.

‘To our beloved IG family, To say thank you doesn’t ever feel like it’s enough.

I was broken (am still in repair) and lost.

2017 Oct was all about cliffhanging in PAIN, learning how to raise a baby girl 3 months old ALONE! No nanny, no relatives, no one just baby and I walking the toughest walk I’ve ever had to.

Tedd Josiah

Guess who came through for us with baby clothes, with baby milk, with words of encouragement, with prayers and more prayers and more prayers…? Our IG FAMILY that was at the time only 20k at the time.

When JayJay’s 1st birthday 🎂 came along I was scared and very jobless about to be kicked out of our home.

People from as far as China sent JayJay gifts 🎁 and cakes 🎂 and so many other things. You made it bearable.’

Adding

‘When we launched mama’s idea of a bag company JOKAJOK you embraced us and have continued to build with us from day one.

Now we not only feed ourselves but we feed 11 other families through employment and we empower single mothers and fathers in our company.

Our head of leather studio is a lady feeding and fending for 3 children alone, all our other staff also have children to fend for and we’ve managed to come this far with you our IG family and build a legacy company.

Tedd Josiah

The road ahead is even longer and only God knows were it leads.

Sometimes strangers become closer than family and love you in a real way they will pray, fast, love and support you.
We don’t take that for granted at all and we want to thank you.

Let’s keep building the bear 🐻 family but also let’s build other people who maybe in need.

WE LOVE AND APPRECIATE YOU. LIVE 🦋 LOVE 💕 LAUGH 😂’

By Mpasho.co.ke

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Grace Ekirapa: I’ve been unable to access DJ Mo since cheating scandal

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Grace Ekirapa, who hosts NTV’s gospel show Crossover 101, has revealed that she had not been in touch with her co-host DJ Mo since rumors he was cheating on his wife Size 8 rocked the internet a fortnight ago.

Ever since reports emerged that DJ Mo, real name Sammy Muraya, was cheating on his wife of seven years Size 8 causing a social media frenzy, the DJ was barred from co-hosting the show with Ekirapa and is thought to be busy trying to glue his marriage together.

Weighing in on the scandal rocking the marriage of her co-host, Ekirapa revealed that she had been trying unsuccessfully to reach out to DJ Mo.

“I haven’t spoken to him and to be honest. It’s been hard for me to get to him. My phone calls haven’t been going through, I know it’s been difficult for him and I think when he is ready he will talk to me. Meanwhile the show has been going on without him but that’s the management’s decision.” Ekirapa revealed during an Interview with Radio Jambo.

She, however, felt DJ Mo should be given a second chance.

“What I will have to say is, when you get saved you won’t stop sinning, you can’t be perfect but there will be consequences. We make mistakes. DJ Mo is an amazing guy and if there’s a chance of working with him again, I would love that.” She added.

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The singer also delved into the rumors that once emerged that she was having an affair with DJ Mo, a married man.

“During the launch of Crossover is when the rumor started. We had done a couple of photo shoots on different days and most of the time his hands was on my shoulder or mine on his and so people got talking.” she explained.

by NN

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