Connect with us

News

A Westerner asked on Quora if Kenya has internet. Big mistake!

Published

on

An unidentified person got more than they bargained for when they asked on Quora if Kenya had internet.

Quora is an American question-and-answer website where questions are asked, answered, and edited by Internet users, either factually, or in the form of opinions.

The question did not go down well going by the answers, as many people felt the question was condescending.

Eric Mutema had a simple answer. “No sir, I am in Kenya right now and I can assure you my tree (in which I eat, sleep and spend my days) has no internet whatsoever.”

He added that if any of his neighbours in the forest and the posh bourgeoisie idiots in the caves had any internet he would have known it by now through the daily smoke signal send out by our chief’s son.So in conclusion sir. We do not have nor will we have any internet any time soon.”

Another smoke answer came one Allan Kamaliki who said that he lives in Kenya and no, “we don’t have internet.”

“Smoke is the most efficient mode of communication here since our rudimentary languages are not developed enough for any coherent communication. It’s quite dangerous though since our treehouses don’t like fire so much and there can be no smoke without fire – unless you have a car which Kenyans don’t,” he added.

He posed, “Now tell me why we need the internet when we can send all the messages we need to send just with smoke?”

“Absolutely not, and whoever tells you otherwise is lying. The white and red-skinnes traders who often come to our shores with their wooden contraptions that float on water have often brought with them tales of a great wonder known as the Internet,” answered Benedict Mwaura.

MOBILE MONEY

Mugo Mahianyu said that for a fact, No! “Kenyan citizens, like the rest of East Africans walk all the way to china in order to at least post anything on the web. We clearly have no access to Internet. Actually, the government of the republic of Kenya is collaborating with the Chinese government to have internet piped to us at least once every two weeks.”

Timothy Gorman Wafula retorted: “No, in fact, the home of M-PESA and mobile money transaction largely rely on smoke signals to send and receive money.”

“No. We use black magic, pigeons, night runners, and shouting across ridges to communicate. In fact, right now, I’m on top of a baobab tree to reply you via black magic while Cayman-alligator-crocodile monster of a hybrid is busy trying to make a meal of me,” answered one Sewe Saldanha.

But there were a few who decided to give the person a few correct answers.

Vinnie Gems said that Kenya a great internet connection. “Most Kenyan citizens access the internet services using their Mobile phones and a smaller percentage using computers although Cyber Cafes are very common in Kenya,” he said.

One Peter Njuguna responded by saying that Kenya has the world’s 14th-fastest mobile internet speed: Oscar Kibet gave his perspective by replying, “Yes, Kenya has internet and its broadband is one of the fastest in Africa. There is coverage of 4G and 3G networks in practically all the regions of the country.”

by Nairobi News

2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. henq

    September 21, 2019 at 5:59 am

    NO!! we use drum beats as a mode of communication and via horn blowing smoke etc….we’d like to reserve our traditions …if we can communicate well under the so said modes why internet??? actually the English that I’m using to respond to you I’ve just invited a white guy to show me on how to write

  2. Kim

    September 21, 2019 at 12:38 pm

    As an American, married 22 years to a Kenyan, I can confirm that Kenya indeed has internet. However, I can also add that the reliability is mediocre at best.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

News

Court suspends Mary Wambui’s appointment as Employment Authority boss

Published

on

Not so fast, the employment court has told politician Mary Wambui in her quest to take the job at the National Employment Authority.

Justice Hellen Wasilwa issued the order in Nairobi on Wednesday in a case filed by the Kenya Young Parliamentarians Association.

In the case championed by the association’s chairman-cum-Nairobi Senator Johnson Sakaja, the petitioners argue that Ms Wambui is not qualified under the law, policy and best practice, to be the chairperson of the authority.

NOT CONFORM

Ms Wambui, Mr Sakaja’s team argues, does not conform to the provisions of Section 10 (2)(c) of the National Employment Authority Act and does not meet the threshold of having at least seven years’ experience in human resource management or its equivalent.

The qualifications of the chairperson of the authority, they say, are mandatory and not discretionary.
The association says Ms Wambui has on several occasions personally admitted that she possesses a limited education, which for all intents and purposes makes her unqualified and unsuitable to conduct the affairs of the chairperson.

The petitioners argue that her appointment would disfranchise the Kenyan taxpayer given the very strategic nature of the position.

“The directive of appointing the 3rd respondent, who is not qualified is not only retrogressive, arbitrary and stale, but also attempts to uncharacteristically undermine the principles of public participation and guiding principles of leadership and integrity,” the petition reads.

Justice Wasilwa certified the case as urgent and set the hearing for November 14.

-Nairobinews

Continue Reading

Entertainment

‘My addiction with strippers left me in debts worth millions,’ Robert Burale

Published

on

Robert Burale has in the past been in debts running into millions but he managed to come out of it unlike most Kenyans who are still struggling.

In a past interview with K24 Faraja, Burale stated that his addiction to stripping and the pressure to keep up a facade of a flashy lifestyle pushed him into debts.

I used to live with both my parents during primary and secondary school but at some point they separated.

Life was good as we were living a high end life before I went to study marketing in London.

I enjoyed going to a new country and the freedom that came with it.

Robert Burale

Little did Burale know that some types of friends can either make or break you.

When I went there I made both good and bad friends.

I was lucky because everything was being paid for by my dad for during my first year so I had a lot of free time.

I started going to strip clubs while in London with the friends I had made.

He adds,

As an African man living abroad, every one wants you, so the attention started making us do things we would not consider doing before.

We started hoping from one strip club to the other.

At some point we got bored with strip clubs in our area and we started venturing to other areas.

He adds,

STRIP GIRLS ARE TAUGHT HOW TO MILK YOU DRY.

WHEN THEY SEE YOU HAVE MONEY, THEY WILL MILK ALL OF IT. WHEN YOU DON’T CHUCK OUT MONEY THEY WILL MAKE SURE YOU GIVE THEM SOME.
EVEN IF IT MEANS REMOVING THEIR BRA.

Burale adds it took time for him to accept his addiction.

It took time for me to know I am addicted. For three years I was just in strip club evangelism where we ‘recruit’ other people into the club.

When I came back to Kenya I found so many strip clubs had been opened and so I started going to savor their services.

Pastor Burale
Robert Burale’s book ‘From the strip club to the pulpit’

He adds

The problem was that when I was in London there was money but once I came back I had no money as my dad had passed away.

The family started fighting for what he had.

In a past interview with Radio Jambo, his ex wife Rozinah Mwakideu, had stated that one of the many reasons they broke up is the many debts he had.

I would receive calls now and then from people and police saying Robert had unsettled debts.

It was a character he had and I kept waiting because I thought he would change because he was born-again.

For example, the main reason why I left was after my friend came to visit me and after she left she wanted to sue him. I couldn’t handle that pressure plus other personal issues.

Robert Burale and ex-wife
Robert Burale and ex-wife Rozinah

Burale explains that his addiction to stripping was where his journey to debts began.

There is no strip club where a woman will give you a show with no money.

There are men who spend even 100,000 on a night.

I once did that and the sad thing is that it was borrowed money.

He adds,

I had to keep up a reputation. I had to go to big hotels and dress well so I kept borrowing.

With time my debts ran into millions.

It got so bad that I had to borrow *John to pay *Peter and the cycle continued.

I only accepted I had a problem after I tried committing suicide.

Burale is now out of debt and this he did by paying off debts slowly with the money he got from his jobs as a motivational speaker, actor and Image consultant.

His advice to people out there is

If you are broke accept it. Ask for help

By Mpasho

Continue Reading

News

Kenyan teen goes missing in Germany after quarreling with her parents

Published

on

Police in Potsdam, Germany are looking for a Kenyan teen who went missing a week ago from her home after quarreling with her parents

The 15-year-old only identified as Britney, has been missing since Tuesday, October 15, 2019.

Mkenya Ujerumani, a local blog about Kenyans in Germany reports that the teen had a quarrel with her parents before she left their home in Drewitz in Potsdam.

At the time she is reported to have said she was going visit some acquaintances but never showed up nor returned home.

Her parents are worried since this is the first time Britney has been away from home for such a long time.

A day after she disappeared, a passerby walking by the banks of River Havel came across a bag with Britney’s personal belongings, identification and some clothes.

POLICE SEARCH

Upon reporting to the police, divers, a helicopter, a drone and search dogs from the coast guard were dispatched for a search operation in the river but nothing was found.

Police printed posters that were placed around all the major train stations in Potsdam but none of the four received clues brought them closer to finding the girl.

“The investigation team consists of ten police officers and will be headed by Commissioner Falk Heidke, who has substantial experience in the search of missing children and teenagers,” the spokeswoman for the Police Department West said on Friday.

Britney moved to Germany from Kenya with her mother and her younger brother about two and a half years ago. She attends a Gesamtschule in Potsdam.

By Nairobi News

Continue Reading

Are you looking for a Church to fellowship in Atlanta Metro Area?

poapay3

Like us on Facebook, stay informed

NEWS TRENDING RIGHT NOW

2019 Calendar

September 2019
M T W T F S S
« Aug   Oct »
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30  
satellite-communication1.jpg

Trending

error: Content is protected !!