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A Westerner asked on Quora if Kenya has internet. Big mistake!

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An unidentified person got more than they bargained for when they asked on Quora if Kenya had internet.

Quora is an American question-and-answer website where questions are asked, answered, and edited by Internet users, either factually, or in the form of opinions.

The question did not go down well going by the answers, as many people felt the question was condescending.

Eric Mutema had a simple answer. “No sir, I am in Kenya right now and I can assure you my tree (in which I eat, sleep and spend my days) has no internet whatsoever.”

He added that if any of his neighbours in the forest and the posh bourgeoisie idiots in the caves had any internet he would have known it by now through the daily smoke signal send out by our chief’s son.So in conclusion sir. We do not have nor will we have any internet any time soon.”

Another smoke answer came one Allan Kamaliki who said that he lives in Kenya and no, “we don’t have internet.”

“Smoke is the most efficient mode of communication here since our rudimentary languages are not developed enough for any coherent communication. It’s quite dangerous though since our treehouses don’t like fire so much and there can be no smoke without fire – unless you have a car which Kenyans don’t,” he added.

He posed, “Now tell me why we need the internet when we can send all the messages we need to send just with smoke?”

“Absolutely not, and whoever tells you otherwise is lying. The white and red-skinnes traders who often come to our shores with their wooden contraptions that float on water have often brought with them tales of a great wonder known as the Internet,” answered Benedict Mwaura.

MOBILE MONEY

Mugo Mahianyu said that for a fact, No! “Kenyan citizens, like the rest of East Africans walk all the way to china in order to at least post anything on the web. We clearly have no access to Internet. Actually, the government of the republic of Kenya is collaborating with the Chinese government to have internet piped to us at least once every two weeks.”

Timothy Gorman Wafula retorted: “No, in fact, the home of M-PESA and mobile money transaction largely rely on smoke signals to send and receive money.”

“No. We use black magic, pigeons, night runners, and shouting across ridges to communicate. In fact, right now, I’m on top of a baobab tree to reply you via black magic while Cayman-alligator-crocodile monster of a hybrid is busy trying to make a meal of me,” answered one Sewe Saldanha.

But there were a few who decided to give the person a few correct answers.

Vinnie Gems said that Kenya a great internet connection. “Most Kenyan citizens access the internet services using their Mobile phones and a smaller percentage using computers although Cyber Cafes are very common in Kenya,” he said.

One Peter Njuguna responded by saying that Kenya has the world’s 14th-fastest mobile internet speed: Oscar Kibet gave his perspective by replying, “Yes, Kenya has internet and its broadband is one of the fastest in Africa. There is coverage of 4G and 3G networks in practically all the regions of the country.”

by Nairobi News

2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. henq

    September 21, 2019 at 5:59 am

    NO!! we use drum beats as a mode of communication and via horn blowing smoke etc….we’d like to reserve our traditions …if we can communicate well under the so said modes why internet??? actually the English that I’m using to respond to you I’ve just invited a white guy to show me on how to write

  2. Kim

    September 21, 2019 at 12:38 pm

    As an American, married 22 years to a Kenyan, I can confirm that Kenya indeed has internet. However, I can also add that the reliability is mediocre at best.

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Lifestyle

Wacu’s big revelation

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Malkia Strikers player, Jane Wacu has opened up about her relationship with her Seychelles lover and their plan to start a family together.

Wacu, who was speaking to Betty Kyalo during the K24 Friday night show Up Close with Betty, said she was ready to settle down soon after the 2020 Olympics games in Tokyo, Japan.

“Plan yangu ni kama hatungequalify Olympics maybe sai ningekuwa na ball. Ilikuwa hii mwaka ndio nilikuwa nimeplan,” said Wacu.

Wacu, who also plays for Anse Royale Club in Seychelles, said she has no intention of having a big family –one child will do for her.

“Mtoi ni God anaplan but after Olympics naweza taka kamjunior, staki twingi, kamoja tu, kwanza kakikuja kaboi niko settled,” she added.

The volleyball queen says she intends to keep her future husband out of the public eyes until they have a baby.

“ Mtoi akicome msee mtamjua but msee yuko,” Wacu said.

Wacu, who has been playing for the national team for the past 14 years, also expressed her happiness in qualifying for the 2020 Olympics in Japan, terming it as one of her greatest milestone.

“Kwa volleyball nimeachieve kila kitu, grand prix, world cup, world champion, professional Europe, club championship na Olympics ndio kitu imebaki tu,” she said.

By NN

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Business

VIDEO: Pomp and colour as ‘Mahiga Homes Ltd’ marks 2nd Anniversary

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ADVERTISER’S MESSAGE: Your number one most trusted real estate developer in East and Central Africa Mahiga homes Ltd celebrated 2nd anniversary in pomp and colour, the event was marked with jubilation as every speaker praised the developer for the great achievements in just two years.

The developer has built and handed over 4 housing projects namely;

*Cornerstone I Estate
*Cornerstone III Estate
*Cornerstone IV Estate
*Kamulu Cornerstone Gardens
The celebrations were attended by several guests and clients who have invested with Mahiga homes.
Kikuyu Diaspora Media CEO Jeremy Damaris and Finance Director Josephine Wairimu graced the event.

Jeremy Damaris had this to say, ‘when Ruhiu told me that he has a project I listened to him and trusted him as my brother, its two years down the line and have never heard any complains from any client.
Mahiga homes Directors thanked and appreciated all the clients from believing in the developer.

Here are the current affordable houses that the developer is selling,
Rockvilla Annex located just 400 meters off tarmac at Joska long kangundo road, Kangundo rd is under construction to upgrade to dual carriageway,Spacious 3 bedroom bungalows master ensuite on plot size 40 by 80 kes 3.95m deposit kes 1.6m then pay the balance in 12 monthly instalments.

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Africa

VIDEO: Pomp and colour as ‘Mahiga Homes Ltd’ celebrates 2nd anniversary

Published

on

ADVERTISER’S MESSAGE: Your number one most trusted real estate developer in East and Central Africa Mahiga homes Ltd celebrated 2nd anniversary in pomp and colour, the event was marked with jubilation as every speaker praised the developer for the great achievements in just two years.

The developer has built and handed over 4 housing projects namely;

*Cornerstone I Estate
*Cornerstone III Estate
*Cornerstone IV Estate
*Kamulu Cornerstone Gardens
The celebrations were attended by several guests and clients who have invested with Mahiga homes.
Kikuyu Diaspora Media CEO Jeremy Damaris and Finance Director Josephine Wairimu graced the event.

Jeremy Damaris had this to say, ‘when Ruhiu told me that he has a project I listened to him and trusted him as my brother, its two years down the line and have never heard any complains from any client.
Mahiga homes Directors thanked and appreciated all the clients from believing in the developer.

Here are the current affordable houses that the developer is selling,
Rockvilla Annex located just 400 meters off tarmac at Joska long kangundo road, Kangundo rd is under construction to upgrade to dual carriageway,Spacious 3 bedroom bungalows master ensuite on plot size 40 by 80 kes 3.95m deposit kes 1.6m then pay the balance in 12 monthly instalments.

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