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Stella Mutahi: The woman who married brothers

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An abusive relationship pushed Stella Mutahi, a middle-aged woman, to marry her former husband’s biological brother.

In a July 22 interview with BBC Swahili’s Anne Ngugi, Stella, who has been in three marriages, reveals that her third and the last union was the “most peaceful and fulfilling of them all”.

Her first marriage, which she entered into while still a student at a hospitality and catering college in Kikuyu, Kiambu County in the mid-90s, ended in the late 90s, yielding a child. The mother-of-four claimed her spouse was violent and had temperament problems.

In 1998, Stella met and fell in love with her second her husband, a man she had known from her childhood days.

The two moved in together in 1999.

The second marriage, which she says was also riddled with domestic abuse, yielded three daughters.

“My husband was erratic. He would wake up in the morning while okay and charming, but in the evening he would turn violent,” said Stella.

According to the mother-of-four, her then-husband blamed his penchant for violence on women, whom he accused of “ruining his life”.

“When I would ask him which women was he talking about, and how they ruined his life, he would not respond,” said Stella.

So violent was her spouse that it affected Stella’s mental health, and that of the children.

“When he returned home every evening, the children would run to their rooms to hide.”

Stella says her partner was also financially irresponsible.

Her tenth year in marriage, marked her transition point.

“It was so bad that I remember developing suicidal ideation. I would walk in the middle of the road so that I could get knocked by a vehicle. I wanted to even get injured on my feet so that my hospital admission could save me from going back home,” she said.

One day, in her tenth year of marriage, she took her children to her cousin’s place, and vowed not to return to her matrimonial home.

One month later, Stella called her husband to inform him that the children needed school fees and school uniform.

She, thereafter, planned to go meet him at their house.

“When I went to the house, I found my husband had moved out. He had only left behind my clothes and those of the children.”

While collecting the clothes her spouse had left behind, Stella chanced upon a baptism card, which indicated her husband had married another woman.

She said that marked the end of her marriage and communication with her husband. It was in 2009.

Her brother-in-law, who had witnessed Stella and her children being subjected to mistreatment, thereafter, began regularly checking on Stella and the kids.

At the time, Stella had rented a small house in Nairobi.

“He (brother-in-law) was so close to my children. Actually, the kids knew him as the uncle who loved them unconditionally. At the time, he was helping me as his sister-in-law and the uncle to my children; there was no romantic affair between us,” she said.

One day, Stella was kicked out of her rented house over unpaid arrears, and her brother-in-law offered to house her and the children.

According to Stella, her brother-in-law’s wife and their children had moved out following unending family dispute.

She narrated that she had never experienced a peace of mind like she did while under the roof of her brother-in-law.

“Too much fondness yields undesired outcome at times. While living in my brother-in-law’s house, he and I started a romantic affair. At the beginning, the relationship was a secret between him and I. I knew too well that the decision I had made [to get into an affair with my husband’s brother] was not a good one, but I couldn’t resist him (brother-in-law). He was loving and caring.”

After a while, people came to know about Stella’s new relationship.

“I came to know that our relationship had attracted criticism from different people. I also came to learn that my children did not approve of my affair with their uncle. However, I had made a decision, and did not want anyone to advise me otherwise. My previous marriages were full of violence and this new man in my life showered me with love and care. I couldn’t resist him.”

Stella’s mother-in-law (the mother of brothers she had gotten into unions with) had, on several occasions, summoned her to address the “problem at hand”, but she refused to honour the summons.

Her second husband came to know of Stella’s new relationship with his brother.

“He (former husband) would text or call to insult me daily on phone,” she said, adding: “I had to file a report at a police station for him to stop abusing me.”

So peaceful was her marriage that Stella came to realise her talent in safari rallying. She was a co-driver, who took part in various races in Kenya across three years, she revealed.

After taking a moment to look back at her life, Stella said she had to bring to an end her relationship with her third husband because “it wasn’t founded on moral grounds”.

“I felt like I had lost the moral standing to advise my daughters on good or bad relationships.”

After nine years of marriage to her third husband, Stella broke the news — that she wanted the relationship brought to an end.

“I told him I wanted to end the affair because I had brought so much conflict in his family, and that our relationship painted a bad picture to my children and his children. My husband accepted, though with so much difficulty.

“My children never recognised my third husband as their dad despite him taking up all the fatherly duties. Their relationship was strained, though they respected him a lot. Throughout my nine-year marriage to my third husband, the children constantly referred to him as ‘uncle’,” said Stella.

In 2018, she walked out of the union to start all over again, but this time around, with her children only.

“It was a painful decision that I had to make. My conscience couldn’t allow me to continue living with my brother-in-law as my husband,” she said.

Stella says she has chosen to come out publicly to seek forgiveness from the wife of her brother-in-law-turned husband.

She is now a crusader for healthy marriages.

By K24 Digital

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Here is why people think I am gay, Kenyan woman opens up

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The Kenyan woman had been rumored to be a lesbian for a long time but no one was quite sure whether that was indeed true.

Not that being gay ia an unusual or a new thing. However, a lot of eyebrows are still being raised when it comes to the issue perhaps because homosexuality is considered an illegal activity in Kenya

Sometime in October 2017 Patricia Kihoro was rumored to have been caught pants down in a lesbian threesome with some other Kenyan women.

But now the Popular Vlogger, actress and singer says her efforts to keep her love life private was the sole reason that led to speculations that she was lesbian.

At the time, it was reported that Kihoro was in a relationship with a well-known female Kenyan rapper and as well as another female media personality.

But the 34-year-old says she has always dated men but kept her relationships low key, which explains why people started speculating she was playing for the other ‘team’.

DATING MEN

“For the longest time, I was dating men. If you go through my Instagram over the years I didn’t even hide. I would post people but it wasn’t like lovey-dovey stuff, if you were keen you would see who I was dating at the time. I would post them in the context that this is somebody in my life but I wouldn’t reveal in what way they are in my life. I think of how private I kept that side of my life, people then speculate, start to make up things,” Kihoro said.

Kihoro shot into the limelight back in 2009 when she took part in the singing competition Tusker Project Fame 3 where she was among the finalists.

She later landed a job as a presenter for Homeboyz Radio and also ventured into acting. Over the years she has also been a very active YouTube vlogger and brand influencer.

“I have been accused of being a lesbian but first of all, it is not an accusation, because calling me a lesbian is not an insult as I have met wonderful human beings who are homosexual and are far better than people who have stood in certain standards of judging others.

So that is why I never speak about it. I am who I am, you know! I know what I stand for and my family knows what I stand for,” said Patricia.

Patricia further revealed that her mother has been very supportive of her work and opinion. She reveals that her first interaction with gay people was courtesy of her mother.

“My mother has supported my work from the start and she always respects my opinion. The first people I ever met who were openly gay were friends of my mum. I was probably 16 years and she didn’t make a big deal about it, and therefore I also did not learn that was a big deal,” revealed Patricia.

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Mother-in-law actor Mustafa, wife announce pregnancy in adorable photo

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Talented Mother-in-law actor Dru Muthure alias Mustafa and his wife cannot wait to welcome a new member into their small family.

Mustafa announced that they are expecting through his various social media pages.

Mustafa who also doubles up as a Hot96 FM presenter shared a photo of his wife rocking a huge baby bump.

The excited man could not hide the joy and captioned the photo saying:

“My heartbeat in one picture.”

Mother-in-law actor Mustafa, wife announce pregnancy in adorable photo

Mother-in-law actor Mustafa and his wife are expecting their first child. Photo: Dru Muthure.
Source: UGC

Kneeling, Mustafa adorably held the baby bump with a wide smile spread on his face.

His wife on the other hand appeared overwhelmed. It appeared as if the two were feeling the baby kick.

Congratulatory messages

Following the announcement, the thespian’s friends flocked the comment section to show their love for the couple.

Many congratulated them for their blessings while others welcomed him to parenthood.

An Instagram user identified as Lydiah Gitachu wrote:

“Awesomeness, congratulations!”

A fan by the name Nelly_munga commented:

“Congratulations to You.”

Owens_wanjiru commented:

“Congratulations! Love just got real! So very excited for you.”

A few months ago, Mustafa celebrated his birthday in hospital despite thinking his big day would be filled with boredom and sadness.

Despite his condition, the people who love him showed up to cheer him up so he could experience some kindness and joy on his big day.

His friends and family arranged a surprise party and visited the actor with goodies and a cake.

The thespian who turned 41 was surrounded by love, cake, laughter, good times and a lifetime’s worth of memories.

By Tuko.co.ke

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PHOTOS: I missed job opportunities because I wasn’t slim – sexy KBC presenter Ray Manyara

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Body shaming seems to be the order of the day on social media and pubic figures are the most targeted.

Milly Chebby, Lynda Nyangweso, Neomi Nganga, Yummy Mummy and Sandra Dacha aka Siprosa are among the many who’ve been body shammed and they campaign for body positivity.

KBC presenter Regina Ray Manyara has revealed that she was recently body shammed by a woman.

She also narrated how she couldn’t secure a job in the media because they were hiring slim women only.

‘SOME LADY CALLED ME FAT….yes
Anyway other than it making me question like who asked for your opinion?
I went back to years, while I was starting my career where for one to anchor/become a TV presenter required one to be slim fit!( perception silent clauses) I was left out of the qualifying list often on account of body size…but here I am today-Doubling as a reporter and newscaster. Long story short…If you are concerned about my weight or anyone’s ( seek them out personally only if you have a remedy!)
Besides, if my size doesn’t bother me, why should it bother you?
*GO FIND WHO HURT YOU*
#bodyshamingiswrong
#bodyshamming IS real!’ she posted.

Check out photos of the beautiful Ray Manyara

Ray ManyaraRay ManyaraRay ManyaraRay ManyaraRay Manyara

Ray ManyaraRay ManyaraRay Manyara

Ray’s followers encouraged her to be comfortable in her own body and ignore critics.

Claire Wambui I once went through the same aki. I had depression after loosing my unborn baby. But I soldiered on coz I am the only one who knows what I am/was going through. But I love our chubby bodies.

Winnie Wilfred Why do people like body-shaming others, people should be thinned by theirs, must they comment just to make you feel bad.. you’re beautiful and wonderful made, and never let anyone underline the one anyone, bring you down…let those fools be, and they have the temerity to question you about you own body, people should grow up.

Tatu Karema You look fabulous! And yes FAT is beautiful 😘….aliyesema kukonda ndio urembo ni nani???????

Lynace Mwashighadi U are perfect. Just the way u are!!!

Kenny Rodgers Haters gonna hate, kelele za chura haiwezi kumfanya ng’ombe asikunywe maji… Keep doing what you do best mwari

Mariah Amor Ngugi Beautiful inside and out! I love the way you look since hizo enzi.

Monica Wandia Who said slim is beautiful…..U are gorgeous and with all the African woman curves… Who hurt her???

By Mpasho.co.ke

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